During last year's challenge I didn't manage to visit every single blog, but the majority of those that I did were written by Americans. No surprise really since a lot of the A to Z hosting team live in the States (I think). So, assuming that most of you reading this are from the other side of the pond, I've decided to take it upon myself to educate you on how to be the perfect Brit. Because that's something you've been dying to learn. Obviously.
(To any Brits who may be reading, feel free to add to this list in the comments. Remember - stereotyping is fine if you're doing it about yourself!)
(To any Brits who may be reading, feel free to add to this list in the comments. Remember - stereotyping is fine if you're doing it about yourself!)
1. You must like tea.
According to the UK tea council, as a nation we drink 165 million cups of the stuff every day. With only 62 million of us living here, that works out at almost 3 cups per person per day. (In case you're wondering, we drink a measly 70 million cups of coffee a day.)
2. You must complain about the weather.
British weather could never really be described as 'extreme'. We don't have very hot summers; we don't have very cold winters, but give us a little more sun/snow than we're used to and we'll gladly go on about it for days.
3. You must never actually complain.
If someone cuts in front of you in a queue (and believe me, we take our queues seriously), you tut and mutter, you loudly point out their mistake to people around you, but you never, ever actually complain to them. Because that would be rude.
4. You must love 'u'.
Why have just an 'o' when you can chuck in a 'u' as well? 'Flavour', 'neighbour', 'colour' and 'humour' will just look more right to you.
4a. You must hate 'z'.
You avoid using 'z' wherever possible because you just don't trust it. (Incidentally, you must pronounce it 'zed', not 'zee'.) You must ignore the fact that 'recognise', 'organise' and 'realise' definitely sound like they should contain a 'z', and instead you must use an 's'.
And finally...
5. You must drive on the left.
Seriously, you'll cause accidents if you don't.
Question: What do you think makes a typical Brit?
3. You must never actually complain.
If someone cuts in front of you in a queue (and believe me, we take our queues seriously), you tut and mutter, you loudly point out their mistake to people around you, but you never, ever actually complain to them. Because that would be rude.
4. You must love 'u'.
Why have just an 'o' when you can chuck in a 'u' as well? 'Flavour', 'neighbour', 'colour' and 'humour' will just look more right to you.
4a. You must hate 'z'.
You avoid using 'z' wherever possible because you just don't trust it. (Incidentally, you must pronounce it 'zed', not 'zee'.) You must ignore the fact that 'recognise', 'organise' and 'realise' definitely sound like they should contain a 'z', and instead you must use an 's'.
And finally...
5. You must drive on the left.
Seriously, you'll cause accidents if you don't.
Question: What do you think makes a typical Brit?
Now I realise why you Brits never complain about the weather :) Actually, my mother is across the pond this week and says it's colder than hell itself. This is my first visit to your blog. Please visit ours at http://citymusecountrymuse2012.blogspot.com/ and please sign up to join our site if you like what you see!
ReplyDeleteWe've had snow every month of the year so far. It is particularly cold at the moment, so I hope your mum isn't too put off!
DeleteThanks for dropping by and good luck with the rest of the challenge.
I think I may secretly be a Brit... (wishful thinking...) I visited Scotland and Ireland a couple years ago and I was the designated driver (because my travel companion couldn't drive a manual transmission car). Driving on the left from the right side of the car really threw me for the first few days... and then I started to figure it out (sort of).
ReplyDeleteI've never driven on the right, so I'm sure I'll have the same problem as you did!
DeleteThanks for visiting - I shall return the favour now!
I love Brits! I always wanted to be one. It started young as a kindergarten student who was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up. I promptly answered "The Queen of England".
ReplyDeleteAw, bless! Well, if you marry Harry (and those ahead of him in line for the throne all mysteriously die) you're in with a chance!
DeleteI do like tea, and may add a 'u' but only because I can't spell. I drive quite well, and do complain about the weather -- Snow last week -- it was spring for gods sakes!
ReplyDeleteAlmost there...
I hear your pain about the snow! We've had more than our fair share of it recently.
DeleteI love the British culture! And I love it even more since watching Downton Abbey!! :-)
ReplyDeleteHave to admit I've never watched Downton but I'm glad it makes you like us even more!
DeleteDon't forget they must love the Queen! Fun list. I'm a Canadian living in the American Mid-west who watches a lot of the BBC. My accent is messed up!
ReplyDeleteAh yes, you've got to love (or hate) the Royal Family! Good point.
ReplyDeleteI love tea now. It makes me happy that I am a true Brit! I love that you and your British family introduced me to the A-Z challenge because I'm loving these blogs and reading more!
ReplyDeleteAh thanks Hannah - I'm really rather over excited about you doing the challenge at the same time this year :D
DeleteThis is hilarious. I am German, now live in the USA. Unfortunately I've never made it to England, but I have many British friends.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment - one of my aims was to make people laugh, or at least smile :)
DeleteMy ancestry is British (at least part of it is). It must be where I get my love for tea. I drink anywhere from 2-3 cups a day.
ReplyDeleteA to Z Participant
Cherie Reich - Author and Surrounded by Books Reviews
2-3 cups? You're in - honorary Brit!
DeleteThe Brits I knew in my younger days were a lot more fashion-conscious than I (to be fair, it doesn't take much). They took issue with my socks, in particular - always white back in the day. Now, I rarely wear white socks and I suspect it's all their fault.
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong. I am very much an anglophile in the sense that many of my favorite people in the world are English. I miss them - often. I like that my socks remind me of them.
White socks are clearly just too boring :P
DeleteThis is hysterical. I'm so glad to have read this. Great way to end the day -thanks for the laugh!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your kind words - and you're very welcome!
DeleteThis was brilliant. I think the typical Brit knows how to weave the word brilliant into everyday speech. Also they are masters of the understatement which is one of the things I love best.
ReplyDeleteWe lived in the UK for 6 years, moved back to the US in 2009, but a piece of my heart remains across the pond. I'llbefollowing along with your A-Z entries. Cheers!
I do use 'brilliant' quite a lot - I'd never realised that was a very British thing to do!
DeleteI was complaining about the weather to a bus driver a few weeks ago, and he told me that there was no such thing as bad weather, just the wrong clothes. So now I'm going to try and stop complaining about the weather, and try to wear the right clothes when I go out!
ReplyDeleteWell, I love tea and drink far too much of it. I always add a U to words such as honour, favourite and humour. I do complain about the weather and love the comment from Rebecca about actually it is wrong clothes!...I love all that because, well, I am British! I do though challenge people when they queue jump me, but I blame that on my Italian side!
ReplyDeleteI like "u"s...
ReplyDeletebut I also like "z"s.
I think I'm a brit. No really. I mean, I don't drive, so I don't have to worry about that. But other than not confronting rude assholes, you pretty much just described me to a "T". :D
ReplyDeleteAlso, my fellow American's poke fun at me on a daily basis because I spell things differently..."Coulour", "Flavour", etc. Funny thing...one said friend that teased me...he TUTted me. It was redundant. Tease me for doing one Brit thing in America while you do another. So I Tutted him right back :D
ReplyDeleteI LOVE this list!! You are a crack up! I'm going to enjoy following you through the challenge.
ReplyDeleteThank you for visiting my blog!
Connie #133
A to Z Challenge.
Peanut Butter and Whine
I'm one of those from across the pond - a 'colonial', as one of my British friends loves to joke with me. I'm an admitted Anglophile, and this post had me giggling! I think the hardest thing about visiting a place where people drive on the left is remembering to look the correct way when crossing the street. I almost met many deaths in numerous London zebra-crossings!
ReplyDeleteJess / Blogging on the Brink